Thursday, December 22, 2011

Pulling the Slacker Till THEY Strangle

I’m going to go on record with the opinion that slackers need to be tied up to the back of a Buick (ANY Buick) and dragged for hours until they promise to cut out the crappy non work ethic! It’s been a long, long, long time since I’ve been a slacker; so to make sure my observations of the current situation weren’t me just being obsessively oversensitive about my own work habits and bitterness (I’ve had a hard time lately with temp jobs full of people who aren’t lifting their end and getting HIRED on just the same….) I looked up the word slacker at, one of my favorite sites ever.

1.  a person who evades his or her duty or work; shirker.
2.  a person who evades military service.
3. an especially educated young person who is antimaterialistic, purposeless, apathetic, and usually works in a dead-end job.


The main reason I despise slackers (yes, despise and no, I’m not being dramatic….more on that later) is because they are generally surrounded by dozens of other people who aren’t, you know slacking. They don’t feel bad or wrong about being paid to do as little as possible. They don’t feel bad about letting other people pick up their part of the work load, while they stare into space or wonder aimlessly. And they KNOW what they are doing! And most annoying of all, they generally get away with it, because these people have the charm to ‘get by’. They don't care how tired you are or about the fact that they are getting away with schlepping around.

I’ve slacked. We’ve all slacked. We’ve all tried at some point in life, and generally more than many times, to get a lot of something for nothing. Think about the times in life where you were either getting paid money, or getting paid in goods for some task. You become distracted, either out of boredom or because you just wanted a moment. So, instead of clearing your mind and completing the task you are being paid for, you do something else that involves random nothingness. It happens!

People who slack on the daily are able to smooth talk their way into people’s graces. They’ve done it many times and are used to people just accepting the behavior. “He’s / She’s so nice!” They seem so interesting those first few weeks.  They are generally smart and warm. They are usually everyone’s friend! Often time, what ends up happening, is down the line, they just become “that guy / girl who doesn’t do much….” They last for years and often aren’t ‘talked to’ about their behavior, because that’s just the way it is…

However, as you mature, you start to realize that doing more and getting paid for it, feels…well… good. You worked hard for what you have and you’re proud. So, you stop slacking. However, there are people who don’t age that way. Part of becoming mature means you become less selfish, less self involved. There are people who remain slackers for life. We call them Losers. We find these people sad, embarrassing… What do we feel about young slackers? We think they're funny! Which ...they aren't.  Maybe we think young slackers are funny because we believe, “Oh, they’ll grow out of it…” But, we’ve seen that this doesn’t always happen. I love  babies and toddlers as much as the next sappy mommy wanna be, however, I don't want them slacking around with me at work while I break my butt and they take their time, intentionally wasting time and getting paid for it!

I despise slackers because I realize something every time I have to endure one. I realize that I don’t want to be on the receiving end of some slacker’s boredom trip! I don’t want to be the one who gets to board the airplane of some slacker pilot who naps in the cock pit. I don’t want to be the one who gets that one bad jar of spaghetti sauce, because some slacker ‘stepped away for a cigarette early, because they couldn’t hold out another minute for anyone’. I don’t want to be in the front seat, operating a car whose breaks slip, because the slacker tech was too busy surfing the net.  

The worst thing about slackers, they are equal opportunity. I despise slackers because there is danger that can be had. Now, the little dumpy job I do now is NOTHING (security wise) compared to the ones listed above, but the concept is transferable.  

The second worst thing about slackers is that, when you complain to another person, (even someone with some power) there is generally nothing they can do. Slackers just seem to be blessed with the option to slip through the cracks.Their selfish, ignorant behavior is appeased for much longer than it should be. (How many times have you heard that so and so, up in whatever department finally got the boot? You say to yourself and the person who told you, "Really....geez he / she was here for like eight years and did nothing! How did that happen?" It takes time to unload a slacker!

So, how do you combat the annoyance of dealing with a slacker? How do you avoid griping about them and get on with your work? How do you maybe get them to grow up? For once, I have no suggestions. Slackers are everywhere! All you can do is avoid ritualistically attempting to murder them. And, wish me luck!!

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